escribo. amo. vivo.

today, all we (my family) did was EAT OUT. bfast, lunch, dinner, everything! last meal was @ di mark's (right spelling ba?), tomas morato ave.  it's mark gil's resto pala...or i think it is coz his son hangs out in the counter and his family was eating right outside the front door of the resto...some sort of welcoming committee maybe?

didn't get to see allen the whole weekend. surprisingly, i didn't miss him that much...i thought of him...mga 90% of the time lang naman. haha

ang tagal dumating ng mga ni-order ko online. mamaya naloko na ko nito...

abt my "application"....hay, i think i'm just fooling myself. really. wala naman akong work experience. hindi pa nga ako qualified in terms of educational attainment. so how the f*ck will i get hired diba?

shit...ba't kasi ang tagal pa nila ako padalhan ng rejection email?! para matapos na 'tong self-delusions ko.

 

thanks to our old pal milenyo - he's a guy right? - i've been given a lot of rush assigns at work. thankfully, i've been able to finish them 4 hours ahead of schedule. believe you me, in my line of work, each minute counts a lot!

our feasibility study defense has been rescheduled to friday. i feel...slightly grateful and mostly indifferent. que sera sera. i really don't know what to expect. we didn't ask for any help from a professional accountant with our financials so i'm a bit apprehensive about our study's figures. again, que sera sera.

is it a graver sin to hate a nun? because there's one that i'm close to despising. she's just too close-minded. this nun was recently elected as dean of our school. she immediately changed the long-standing policy on special subjects. now, graduating students aren't able to request as many subjects as they wish on their last term. as a result, a lot of students that are supposed to graduate this year suddenly find themselves as incoming JUNIORS. when the students complained about that in the school's open forum session with her, she kept on jokingly referring to students as self-centered (more or less). she was insinuating that young people - yes, all young people, --- these days only welcomed changes that are beneficial to them.

is there anything unreasonable about wanting to graduate early????

hate may be too strong a word to use right now, but i'm definitely mere inches away from experiencing that particular emotion...FOR HER.

on a lighter note, i'm happy to hear that allen's family has two final choices to consider for their new home. one of them is apparently owned by mike cortez and quite a bargain at that. i'm happy because as they'll be moving south for their new home, we'll be moving south as well!!! yup, my mom is considering relocating... even if it means giving up our ancestral home, sometimes, you just need to move on and make a new beginning for yourself.

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i'm determined not to shop at all for new clothes until i've gained my ideal figure. promise!!!

the company you applied to promised to inform you ASAP regarding the status of your application. in other words, if you're hired or not. it's been weeks, and there's still no reply whatsoever. what does that mean?

a) nothing

b) they've forgotten about you

c) you've potential, that's why you're still under serious consideration

what do you think????? 

is when people lash out at you beacuse they can't show their anger to the ones they're truly angry at.

what's worse is when it's someone you care about who's doing it to you. they're doing it because they know they can get away with it. they can get away with it because they know you care for them. these people aren't essentially bad...but that doesn't make it right either.

 

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ignoring allen's advice, i've decided to follow up on my application. anyway, i've seen a lot of sample follow-up letters for job applications online, so i'll just take that as proof that it's an understandable response. hopefully. so all i can do is cross my fingers and PRAY for the best.

 

worst case scenario: they think i'm a pest and reject me out of hand. well, it's a risk i'm willing to take....it's a risk i've already taken. no looking back. 

 

thanks to EVERYONE who gave me encouraging words in my last post. i thought it would simply be economical to just thank all of you in my next post hehehe....

anyway, i've finally shortened it. twas only when i was calculating the proportionate # of words i had to remove from each chapter that i realized cutting it down to 30000 from 59000 more or less meant taking away half of my book!

BUT...it's okay. it wasn't that painful. only thing is, i'm worried now that after reducing its size, the mini or lite version of the original story isn't as good or fun.

oh well...at present, i'm back to the waiting-for-feedback-phase. absolutely nerve-racking still....hay...i want to start dreaming that it would pass, but really, even at this stage, i know it would be premature to do so... anything can happen... i can still fail.... 

allen always tells me that i'm too impatient by half, i tend to blow up whenever things don't go according to planned....

but i don't think it's the case right now. it's just that i'm really really excited and scared abt the prospect...it's been almost a week since i passed my edited manuscript and still no word. i've finally emailed the editor today once more beginning with the subject line PLEASE DON'T BITE MY HEAD OFF. basically i'm acknowledging the fact that i might be acting a wee bit makulit, but really, i'm dying for any kind of news or feedback. haaaay. it's gonna suck big time if it turns out that i failed.

my manuscript's scheduled for a final review next week.

siiiiigh. i'm still in no way certain if it's going to pass or not. anything can happen. although i know write fairly well, it might still not be well enough to get published (there! i've finally managed to say the word). it just seems too good to be true, and i don't think i even deserve it. i'm not a bad person, but i've my own share of faults. i don't think i'm good enough yet for my dreams to come true.

hay. who knows what will happen nga naman talaga.

ever since that fateful day i took a chance on my work - and when better to submit it than on my bday (i need all the luck i can get) - it feels like my life has been on a standstill. it's unable to move because i don't know which direction it should take. nevertheless, whatever happens, i don't regret submitting my manuscript. after all...

nothing ventured, nothing gained.
successful people don't wait for things to happen to them, but rather they make things happen.
the only failure in life is not trying, and not trying hard enough.
covey's rule #1 - BE PROACTIVE.

i got invariably stuck at the mall for about two hours. looong story. and since none of us - me, my shobe and cuz - had any cash and the bpi express teller wasn't working, we had to walk and walk and walk. i couldve hung out @ the gym but then i'd leave the two with nothing to do so better suffer together right? it wouldve been tolerable IF i didn't have my period THERE. shit. double triple shit.

i can't really ask for a better bf. allen's such a perfect match for me. we have an imperfect relationship and an imperfect love but i think we suit each other perfectly. we're similar and different in the right aspects. sure, i still don't totally trust him after what he ALMOST did, but hey, if God can forgive us for ALL our trangressions, who am i not to forgive allen as well right? but it was allen himself who told me that any guy or girl who makes that kind of mistake once is understandable - not excusable, mind you but understandable --- but if he or she does it twice, off with his head! siya na ang nagsabi nyan ah. but i completely agree.

i'll miss him tom. won't be seeing him the whole day. hay.

yeaniway, last weekend, after receiving the editor's reply on fri, i wanted to take my mind off things so i went with allen, my shobe, uncle jojo, and chac #6 and his wife to the oktobeerfest @ metrowalk. that however didn't work out the way i wanted it to be, coz i sorta got sick. lack of sleep, lack of food, recurring backache and incipient signs of ulcer made me one very dizzy momma. soooo i took the initiative to foot our bill so i could ask them to take me home. yeah, i kinda ruined the night for them, but at least i treated them all to dinner. sooooo sorry peeps. next year ulit okay? hehe

i want one of those fly-swatters! y'know, the ones shaped like tennis racquets and w/c can electrocute flies! less than P200 lang raw yun eh. i'm dying to kill some mosquitoes. kakatakot ma-dengue!

i'm determined not to talk or even think about my book proposal the whole week. que sera sera. it's like what the welcoming message in my cellphone says: God has plans for you.

two of my old clients have been emailing me nonstop about the latest ebooks i'm selling. i really want to start selling again, but these days, no time talaga. this home-based job of mine has its disadvantages as well. but there are more perks, so i'm definitely not complaining.

i had an entry saved in the other computer about PBA. ginebra's supposedly the team to beat this conference but guess what? we just had two straight losses after three straight wins. ooooooohhhhhhh well.

allen and i watched underclassman in dvd. it was cool. hanging out with him is way cooler though. always. speaking of movies, i wanna watch tXt and till i met you! hehehe. allen's willing to accompany me to both, but only if he's allowed to close his eyes with the first and to remain incognito with the latter. men!




 

although local companies can't afford to pay their CSRs and TSRs as much as BPOs does with theirs, that doesn't mean they should lower their hiring standards. i understand that whatever bone i have to pick up with is not with them but with the company. they should have the same understanding as well, but unfortunately not all of them do. as such, when even just the tiniest note of anger and irritation creeps inside our notes as we complain, these agents immediately go on the offensive.

i just got off the phone after a very unsatisfying conversation with a bayantel center rep. we're on the same street as the bayantel center, we just got our dsl installed last sunday (and it went kaputz on that day itself) and they still haven't sent a technician to fix our dsl problem.

i understand that there are SOPs for these things, so all i'm asking is to make an extra priority of our case coz we're just minutes away from their hub. and all i'm asking from the agent is to make a follow-up report. is that too much to ask?

apparently, it is because when i asked him to prioritize our case, he goes on with a stuffy bored voice: all calls our prioritized et al et al.

i was so incensed that i said "it doesnt seem possible" i'd like to say it's not obvious at all, but that would be ruder.

and while i was explaining our case, he keeps on saying yeah, yeah, yeah...it was obvious he wasn't really listening, and he was just waiting for me to shut up. it took all my effort to still be polite and say thanks. he didn't make the same effort by the way. there were a lot of other things he said that were pretty insulting, but i'm just too drained right now to list them all down.

CSRs are supposed to care. they're customers themselves in other aspects of their lives. they should empathize with us. i know there are bitchy callers, those who are in automatic kill-the-messenger mode, but that's their cross to bear for applying for a CSR job.

another eye-opening call center entry can be found at wandergirl's tabby here.

last friday, i emailed the editor again regarding my manuscript since they did say that it was scheduled for a final review last week. i waited 5 long days before emailing them but there was no reply.

i'm now more than halfway convinced that my manuscript is going to be rejected. haaaay. so, i won't talk about it anymore. the next time i do talk about it, i'd be able to let you know i got lucky...or not.

i miss going to the gym. had to stop temporarily because of my back, which was quickly followed by my period, but now i'm okay so hopefully i can go to the gym tom. 

i'm so proud. despite all kinds of temptation - most of which comes from allen, coz he wants us to shop together - i've still been able to stop myself from buying ANY CLOTHES. i'm determined not to shop until i've successfully shed off 10 pounds.

good thing that i finally got to go back to the gym the other day. twas super fun. going to the gym with allen's one of my dreams in life, and i'm so happy that it came true.

fushigi yuugi is back on TV. i also saw the whole series being sold as well as samurai X. me wanna buy! i even saw zenki!

last sunday, we went to grace christian gospel - or something like that - at congressional avenue (across cheri fooderama - did i spell it correctly). my uncle's taking his practicum there and his sermon's theme was WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS NOW IS LOVE. simple message, different take, and still an important thing to remember, ne?